Last Term

In retrospect, last term, overwhelmed me.

-piano lessons
-phd applications
-playwriting course
-feminist methodologies in sociology grad seminar

I've decided to throw it all out the window, and to clear my plate close to completely. I don't want any of that.

By December, i was so exhausted emotionally, I could not leave the house. I blame it on rampant consumerism and political incorrectness. But that was just an excuse. I was tired.

The problem was that I pressured myself into doing things I didn't care about, to the neglect of things I did care about. I never congratulated myself, never patted my own back or awarded myself. I promised myself one year to explore creative writing and theatre. So far, the last 8 months have been spent worrying about getting into grad school.

For as long as I need, I'm going to concentrate on creative writing, particularly in writing for theatre. I'll seek to publish chapters from my MA thesis. Perhaps I'll take a job in theatre.

I don't want to start a PhD until I've fulfilled myself creatively.