The Crush III: Dance Fundraiser

(saturday evening, St. John's Cultural Center)

Nothing happened, like embaressingly pathetic! I had an eye out for this guy the entire nite. And whenever i lost sight of him, i'd be like "no! he's left, and i didn't do anything!" okay, i don't know how to write this for it to sound any less pathetic. It's around midnite, and i see him put on his jacket, saying his goodbyes (no!). So (okay, be prepared to hyperventilate), i go to the washroom to pee, thinking and planning that when i go back into the room, he would be just about to exit, and we would encounter one another at the door. And we do--he rmbrs my name, gives me a hug, says goodbye. That's sweet. But I say nothing, except "thanks, goodbye."

On another note, i did have fun socializing and meeting other keen dancing folks. Actually, i really do enjoy ballroom--it's a lot of fun. And i'll improve, if i keep at it. Also, people are really nice and sociable--b/c we have a common interest. So, it was good.

One thing i learned, in terms of personal development, is that i don't necessarily have to be good, to like, to learn, or to do something. "The woods would be really silent, if only the best birds sang" (Greg). I feel i'm not good, but i'm still throwing myself out there, so it seems such a joke. But I keep reminding myself: no biggie: most everything is forgotten and forgiven: pretend you're dead, and things matter less. It's quite ironic that passion qualifies: think ashlee simpson.

Focus on process.