Studying Postcolonialism and Feminism, i realise that they are selfish discourses. They fight for a voice, a representation, claiming back what they have lost. They are fuelled with greed, a need for more. They are not loving, giving, kind and compassionate, self-sacrificing.
And I thought I was fighting for the underdog, the silenced and the forgotten, the poor things--righting the wrongs. But isn't it that no matter what we fight for, struggle for, advocate, we are still selfish. For those verbs are selfish verbs--selfish acts--even if we were advocating a loving, self-sacrificing god. For whenever we advocate a cause, we are seeking attention, energy, life towards that cause. Perhaps I should thesaurus a new word. But what's the point?
I feel that I am placed in a very difficult bind--that no matter how hard i try, no matter what i do or believe, i am still wrong, bad, some negative adj.. It seems that is the inherent nature of being as selfish. Maybe it really is all in the language.
Does that comfort me? Because all i ever wanted was for you to love me.
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1 comment:
sames thinks yeeges is thinking much. if yeeges wants unselfish stuff, yeeges should be advocating christianity.
feminism + postcolonism is selfish. but so what? selfish=good. your success depends on someone else's failure. so succeed. SUCCEED!! (yay...me pay attention in english class)
anyway...you gotta experience things before you can try to change things. to be a feminist you must be a woman, to be in an anti-racist campaign you have to be a minority...right?
it's all about the "group self". by helping yourself you are helping others with the same problem.
so...they are selfish discourses which help many people. yay. ^_^ hopefully my point is as clear as yours. ^_^
love yeeges!!!!
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